grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
I woke up to an email from Groupon for 3 laser lipo treatments...on Valentine's Day...way to kick me when I'm down Groupon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize