Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
21 Ladies Confess The Grossest Things They Do When No One’s Around
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
23 Tweets I Thought Were Really Funny When I Was Drunk Yesterday
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.