I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
Omg just saw this kid I went to elementary school with at the bar and he used to be cool and I was so awkward but now I have boobs so I WIN.
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Randomize
