i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
I need to sanitize my soul.
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
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