Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
Where is the baby squirrel I found last night?! I've looked all morning I can't find Morris anywhere did someone take him?? ðŸ˜ðŸ˜
Honey, I kept trying to tell you it was just a pine cone.
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
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