thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
Randomize
