I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
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