i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
Too bad they don't have an emoji symbol for condoms and 99 cent tacos
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
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