I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
you didnt know i had herpes?
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
I baptized my dog in my pool last night because he snapped at my party guests, how was your night?
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
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