The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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