Its about making memories worth repressing
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
Randomize
