thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
Just walked in and was handcuffed to a police woman. Fire fighter woman poured franzia down my throat. Aaaaand I just ate cookies off of Little Red Riding Hood's tits.
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
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