Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
It’s 830 am and the amount of Valentine’s Day snaps I’ve already seen makes me either want to vom, drink a bottle of wine, or buy chocolate
1000% No lie I was just looking on insta and was thinking about taking a bottle of wine to the face..
Randomize
