This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
Randomize
