Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
Alternately I could tell him western classical is just a series of events that had to happen for music to reach the point where Beyoncé was able to pen drunk in love, which is the pinnacle of humanity's artistic achievement thus far
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
Randomize
