I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
We just saw a waitress walk by with a tray of bacardi and whipped cream.
Whoever ordered that deserves a pat on the back and the "classiest customer" award
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?