Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
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