i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
I woke up to 'call me' written in red lipstick on my chest. Thats the hottest/sluttiest thing ever. I win at LIFE!
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was just shot with a dart gun by one of my coworkers while walking to the printer. Ironically I was printing my resignation letter...
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
Randomize