So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
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