i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
My lawyer watched my DUI video. Said of the thousand or so he's seen, mine was one of the top ten best.
She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
I met this girl the other day and found out her boyfriend is a helicopter pilot. How the fuck do you compete with that.
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize
