I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
Randomize
