We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
Tried to land my foot on his shoulder and kicked him in the face. Then I fell into a homeless man's bike and posed with a buffalo head. How was your night?
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
Randomize
