yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
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