This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
I met this girl the other day and found out her boyfriend is a helicopter pilot. How the fuck do you compete with that.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
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