btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
I lost the right to judge tonight
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Randomize
