We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
True strength comes from lack of pants
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
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