It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In sex ed. they really need to include a lesson on saying tampon in foreign languages, just in case.... Trying to ask the woman at the reception desk, who barely speaks English, for one just turned into an awkward game of charades.
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
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