I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
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