Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
I just took a dump to end all dumps. Other dumps have already written ballads about it. It was the Armageddon dump. Bruce Willis was there, it was awful.
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
A part of me realizes this is a bad time to text. But I override it with my awesomeness
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
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