She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Randomize
