Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
