So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
What a dumb baby whore.
I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize