ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
Randomize
