The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
Randomize
