Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
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