I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
her vagina looked like bernie madoff
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
Randomize
