The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
Randomize
