Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
I'm standing on the corner in a banana costume and cape with frozen bananas in my utility belt reassessing my life decisions.
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
Randomize
