U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
Him cheating on his girlfriend resulted in a $1500 hospital bill from repeated blows to his testicles by my ass. They diagnosed his pain as "testicle trauma". Sex karma at it's finest.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
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