Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
i woke up this morning from the best one night stand. i made the guy mickey mouse pancakes for breakfast and when i walked back into the bedroom he said "marry me"
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