Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
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