I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
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