New high or new low? Cat walked into the bathroom while I was taking a #2, looked @ me, sneezed and walked out..
Why are we friends again?
what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
Randomize