he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Randomize