i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
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