I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
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