508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
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