i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
Sorry about my sloppy drunk texts. I'm not sure talking about banging a near dead Jimmy Stewart was my finest moment
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
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