he wants to bone in the snuggie
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
Randomize
