ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
please don't call me when you're wasted. i don't feel like having any other future arguments at 3:18am about how to hang up your phone. you have a flip phone, you should know regardless of how fucked up you are.
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
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Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
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As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
Randomize